Jenna Jameson is pregnant

When I think of celebrities that either already are – or have the potential to be – truly terrible mothers, images of Britney Spears, Paris Hilton and Pamela Anderson come into my mind. They’re not just the kind of women you wouldn’t describe as maternal – they’re the kind of women that would accidentally leave their baby next to a steaming hot jacuzzi with a television placed precariously on the edge while they went outside for a smoke.

But Jenna Jameson never even made it onto my mental list, because I never imagined she could even have a baby. I assumed everything was hollowed out down there, but apparently that’s not medically accurate, because according to Page Six, the woman who is arguably the most famous porn star in the world is pregnant.

CONGRATS to Jenna Jameson. The retired porn queen is pregnant with the baby of her boyfriend, UFC champ Tito Ortiz. "She had a bunch of meetings and things planned for Fashion Week, including meetings for her own line, but she's postponed everything," said our source. "She's completely thrilled, this is something she's wanted for a very long time." Jameson miscarried during her marriage to Jay Grdina, whom she divorced in 2006. She also once failed with in vitro. Jameson's assistant didn't return calls and Ortiz's rep had no comment.

[From Page Six]

The jokes to be made are so easy – and so filthy – that I won’t make them. I’m really surprised Jenna was able to get pregnant. She’s been looking incredibly emaciated for the last couple years. Frankly she looked like she had anorexia, which she’s denied. She did have a battle with skin cancer, and she placed the blame for her weight loss on that and the stress from her divorce. But whatever the cause, I’m truly shocked that she was able to conceive. Hopefully she’ll lay low and put on some much needed weight.

I want a lot of credit for not making any hysterical jokes. Like this headline on Fark.

Here’s Jenna Jameson and Tony Ortiz at 'Good Charlotte Good Morning Revival' at the Hard Rock Hotel Casino in Las Vegas on July 5th. Header image from the Pre-Emmy Nominee Party hosted by Darin Brooks on June 13th. Images thanks to WENN.